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Banks Taketh, but Don’t Giveth

Published in the New York Times Op-Ed

BANKS are eating up all the real estate in my neighborhood. I live on a basically residential street, and within three and a half short blocks of my house are eight banks: two Chase, one Wells Fargo, one Citi, one HSBC, one Bank of America, one Sovereign and one Capital One. Go two more blocks and there are 10 banks (one more Chase and one more Citi).

13 Ways of Looking at My Body

Definitely not naked from the back ... and 12 more

See the full set

Published in Oprah magazine

Hey! You Stole My Name!

Published in the New York Times Op-Ed

ABOUT seven months ago I was name-jacked. 

I hadn’t looked at my Web site in a while, but I figured that, with a novel coming out, I should bring it up to date. So I Googled deliaephron.com (I never had gotten around to bookmarking it) and it wasn’t there. Instead there was a message: This domain is for sale.

If My Dad Could Tweet

Published in the New York Times Op-Ed

My dad can’t tweet because he’s dead. He died in 1982, when telephones were about the only way to have a conversation with someone who was not in the same place you were.

My dad was an uproar man. Uproar was his specialty. He loved calling one daughter with news of another, often inaccurate, trying to stir up trouble and envy. When he was close to death and could barely recognize his own hands, he could remember my telephone number and continued to call any hour of the day or night. There was no caller ID then. I didn’t have the option of knowing who it was and not answering.

“Hello,” I would say.

“Your sister won the Pulitzer,” he would say. And hang up.

As I said, he never got it right.